Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Day 35 - Torn

Tonight included going back to school for parent meetings for our upcoming week of camp. There is a lot of excitement and anticipation in the air, and I am excited at the opportunity to join all of our sixth graders at this great learning opportunity. My three older boys had the opportunity to go, and I know how meaningful it is.

Then I looked at the time I was missing with my own boys. There are two still young enough to be at home, and I left them alone so I could go prepare for a week with other kids.

Before, it didn't matter as much. I was happy to give up my own time. And it's not that I'm no longer happy about it. It's more about that they've cut so much that I can barely support my own kids. It's about the guilt that comes because I'm trying to balance time not only between work and my boys, but now also on worrying about things like will the power still be on when I get home, or where can I squeeze in another job.

I am so excited about camp and the amazing experiences it brings. Now if I could just let go of the guilt...feeling torn...

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